The Hardest Thing

With a smile on my face and that brave glow in my eyes
I cry and sob albeit quietly and silently
Those silent tears that only I can hear
That crushing sorrow that only the mirror can see
I don’t want you to see my despair
Nor would I want you to notice my dismay
For your sake I will shed my tears behind closed doors
For though I am filled with anxiety and scared to the bone
My pride for you reigns supreme over panic
So that when it’s finally time to watch you walk away
I will do so with my head high
And joyous peals of laughter
I will not allow tomorrow’s unknown to steal
Yesterday’s beatitudes
For I do not know whether the future holds we
Or if the crystal ball sees only me
But I know that I will not shut the door
And the closing chapter for this will not be written just yet
Just because the days will pass and life will go on by
And I will not see you as I would wish to
I will not erase the memories or ignore the next possibilities
Instead I will let the things that I am certain of decide tomorrow
I am certain that I know you,
I am certain that I cherish you
And I am certain that I love you